The Battle Is On For The New Face Of The DNC

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The race for the new chairperson of the DNC is officially underway, and the line up of talent in the nominations this year is absolutely unprecedented. Each candidate is a pioneer of social justice and passes with flying colors in the realm of identity politics, with members from almost every victim group from Muslims and the LGBTQ community to womyn and African Americans.

First up in the cards, we have the estimable Sally Boynton Brown, who sparked controversy in the right wing media and angered millions of privileged whites when she courageously claimed that her job as DNC chairwomyn would be to “shut other white people down” and make sure that ONLY people of color are heard.

Next up, we have the first ever Muslim American candidate for the DNC chairmanship, Keith Ellison. Ellison is also the first ever Muslim American congressman, and he is known for having some of the most progressive views in American politics. Another candidate, Vincent Tolliver, was outed from the DNC race for being an Uncle Tom and stating that people shouldn’t vote for Keith because Islam is against homosexuality. Not true! Keith Ellison states that Christians should support gay marriage, but criticizing Islam is Islamophobia:

Next we have Pete Buttigieg, an openly gay candidate who would no doubt do much to advance LGBTQ rights. Pete however, is a white male who served in the military, which makes him substantially less qualified than the other candidates.

Lastly, we come to the beautiful Jehmu Greene, an African American womyn and daughter of Liberian immigrants. Liberia was created many years ago by white racists as a country that allowed freed African American slaves to return to Africa. White oppression however followed them back to Liberia and wrecked their country, and Jehmu Greene symbolizes a return of the Liberians to America to end white privilege once and for all. Jehmu courageously called Tucker Carlson a “Bow-tying white boy” in reference to his white privilege, in retaliation to him criticizing Elizabeth Warren for identifying as a Native American.

The list of candidates that the DNC has put forward demonstrates just how forward thinking the Democratic party is, and just how out of touch the rest of America is. By steadfastly refusing to bend to the will of white voters in rural America, and continuing to appeal almost exclusively to the growing demographics of recent immigrants, the Democratic party is taking the long view and setting themselves up for an unbeatable winning streak starting in 2020. As whites rapidly become a minority in America, there is a bright, free and prosperous future ahead of us as the DNC’s all-star line up paves the way for progress and shows the world how it’s done. Viva la revolucion progresivo!

Wolf \"Riot Dog\" Blitzer - J20 Matters.
Wolf \"Riot Dog\" Blitzer - J20 Matters.

Outstanding Candidates, this is exciting. My atheistic spirit soars in anticipation. It is like waiting for the best Jon Kerry Heinz Ketchup! It’s SLOW GOOD. My preference, and I was actually recently certified as an accredited Preferential Professional by the San Fran BLT association would be Ellison as he is crystal clear in his principles of inclusiveness of pretty much anything, which is the type of laser like leadership the DNC so richly deserves. I wonder is he can reach out to Larry Ellison on the fund raising yacht circuit, as well as mine the Oracle databases for our recruiting efforts. In other news, the pesky Ruskies are at it again. The headine from a confidential spokesperson at a REAL NEWS Outlet reads “Russia names Edward Snowden new Ambassador to the United States” http://www.duffelblog.com/2017/02/ambassador-snowden/
Can you believe the nerve of Putin? What an insult. What’s wrong with the ambassador they have? A Brain Dead move. Unnamed DHS sources say Edward Snowden has received a proposal from spy Anna Chapman via twitter! We must block this obvious plot against us.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-f3q_t7axVc

Black Lives Matter

Tucker Carlson IS a bow-tying WHITE BOY. He needs to SHUT UP and CHECK HIS PRIVILEGE.

Jehmu and Keith would both be excellent choices. We need an African-American. Jehmu earns additional points as a womyn, but Keith also earns additional points as a Muslim. It’s a hard choice, but I would probably go with Jehmu.

trav777

Agree- ONLY a coalition of minorities that appear to be disgruntled and pathologically hostile can be the path to the future of tolerance and diversity.

To the uninitiated, it looks like despite the nonstop bleating from “republicans” about how Hispanics and blacks are “natural conservatives” due to their nearly total alignment with that party’s professed stance on social issues, that they are voting AGAINST whites by forming a bloc irrespective of what the actual party platform is. It’s like race matters or something…

Anon
Anon

He’s 1/1257th Indian so he gets a free pass.

trav777

Sally Boyton Brown is still privileged and should not even have been speaking.

She is telling everyone she wants to lead but that white people shouldn’t be leading. What a trainwreck. She thinks that by being an Uncle Tim she can shed her white privilege? HELL NO. You’re STILL GUILTY, Sally. When will white people ever learn that until the very last white person is gone, white people will be responsible for all bad things that are happening or ever have happened?

Make my votes count
Make my votes count

David Duke from the KKK has sanctioned Larry Ellison so he is who I need to go with. It seems Larry has the strength to bring back some of the original democratic base.
Additionally he said blacks should not have to do anything the government says.
If he can get Sally Boyton Brown to back him up by shutting down all the white voices The 2018 and 2020 elections will be fantastic with all the power going to the party that deserves it.

MARYBLOW1977
MARYBLOW1977

Studies have shown that black men have larger penises than other races. Muslim men are know to be brave enough to use their penises in very public places like pools and concerts. This bravery, combined with a black mans sized penis is why I have to say:
I’M WITH KEITH!!! If he can’t get the democrat party back in shape, no-one can!

How about you guys?

Anon
Anon

You know what they say, “Two heads are better then one” and the larger the better.

and of course the ability to use your head in public is always a positive.

#sexist

Anon
Anon

I think Huma Aberdeen would do well

A Muslim woman, married (divorce imminent which is a plus to male haters) to a sex addict, and involved in covering up Hitlery’s e-mail scandal.

Just Perfect!

Divorcing her husband however is a negative for Muslim voters as a Muslim woman is not allowed to divorce her husband.

Perhaps her husband should read up on the Korans advise on how to punish wives for misbehavior. No broken bones, no pokes in the eye, also avoid punching the face as bruises there could permanently disfigure her.

johnny utah
johnny utah

My vote goes to Clayton Bigsby. Here is a Frontline piece on him.

http://www.cc.com/video-clips/7nnosh/chappelle-s-show–frontline—-clayton-bigsby-pt–1—uncensored

He’s is a person of color and can reach across the aisle. A real role model and the TRUE voice of the people.

richandrenee

If we had the universal income we’d be able to cut people off for racism!!

Black Lives Matter

SEND THEM TO AN ALASKAN GULAG

Black Lives Matter

Why is no one talking about White Privilege?

#triggered

johnny utah
johnny utah

I’d hate to be a black man in America these days. Do you know how expensive pot is getting? What happened to dirt weed that was all twiggy and seedy?

Anon
Anon

But the price of heroin is dropping.

Beats me how legalizing pot makes it more expensive, while illegal heroin drops in price.

Must be taxes. Can’t think of another reason.

Anon
Anon

penis size is of vastly more interesting.

and WHITE seamen. Can forget about THAT.

richandrenee

Elizabeth Warren would do so much for Native Americans and keep big business in check – win win.

Black Lives Matter

But if Warren becomes the head of the DNC, who will take over as interim President once Trump is impeached in a few weeks? We could bring back Obama as President, but it looks like he is in line to become the next President of France, which is a vastly more enlightened country than the United States.

richandrenee

Obama should be president of the US and the entire EU!!

Black Lives Matter

Problem solved! Third term! Third term!

littleshoppinlucy
littleshoppinlucy

That would be so cool BLM. The world would be safe again.

Anon
Anon

Its a shame he can’t become President of Zimbabwe. Mugabe is President for LIFE.

AccreditedThinker

The answer is obvious: Obama should be President of the World; he’s part White, Part Black, Part Muslim, Part Christian. Even alt-Right haters have to admit it’s impossible to get any more diverse than he is; they believe he’s in a transgender marriage.

#ObamaPresidentoftheUN_2020

johnny utah
johnny utah

I stopped by a convenience store today and noticed a lot of black folks buying lottery tickets. Does the lottery classify as tricknology? This is very confusing, a government run program that may be racist… It is melting my brain!! Should negros be given special odds to increase their chance of winning?!??!?
Someone please tell me what to think here! I’d love to see an article from an accredited Accredited Times journalist.

Make my votes count
Make my votes count

I will let one of the Accredited Journalist handle the social/moral aspect of your question. As far as special odds, tracking the buyer would be too difficult. Now if you were to win the lottery than by all means you should give them your winnings as part of the reparations payment that you owe.

Anon
Anon

It’s actually part of an infinite loop

Blacks spend welfare money at the lottery.

and lottery money then goes to fund welfare.

It is plain as day that if blacks DO NOT SPEND money at the lottery, they wont get their welfare check (sometimes known as reparations) and end up flat broke.

johnny utah
johnny utah

Ahhh.. Of course! Spend tax dollars on government programs so they go right back to the government! More tax dollars are spent (re-collected) compared to what is given out by “winning” so the government actually profits from exploiting the black persons desire to be rich while keeping them poor! If government went broke, minorities wouldn’t have anyone to look after them, so it’s ok.

No wonder we had to elect a one term democrat governor (Jim Hodges) in the state I live to put the program into place! what a fucking hero!

Anon
Anon

Trickology at its best!

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