WASHINGTON, D.C. (Accredited Times) – Here at the Accredited Times, we support progress. And, by progress, we mean liberalism, by which we mean socialism, by which we mean communism.
Confused? Well, it’s not so terribly confusing. You see, conservatives have long demonized our philosophy, so we have had to change labels constantly to make our philosophy more palatable. We do this quite often. For example, originally the Biblical term “Sodomite” referred to the LGBTQQIAPABCDEFG+ community; then we changed the term to the more scientific “homosexual”; then we changed the term to “gay” (meaning “joyous”); then, after young people started using the term “gay” as an insult, we started using “LGBT”; then we added new letters and the plus sign to make it more difficult for anyone to insult the LGBTQQIAPABCDEFG+ community. Try saying, “Dude, that is so LGBTQQIAPABCDEFG+!” LOL, not going to happen.
Communism has long been unpopular for reasons that escape us at the Accredited Times. Why wouldn’t people want free housing, healthcare, food, and water AND equality? Granted, slaves had these things as well, and communism basically makes everyone a slave to the state, but communism is very different from private chattel slavery. The main difference is that government is run by people who care, like Hillary Clinton and Barack Hussein Obama, whereas private businesses are run by evil people motivated by profit. The difference is crystal clear when one compares communist paradises, like the Soviet Union, North Korea, and Venezuela, to evil capitalist countries, like Switzerland or South Korea. Where would you rather live?
Fortunately, notwithstanding the unpopularity of our ideology, many conservatives in government and the media have set aside their differences to help us implement our common-sense philosophy, at least on a case-by-case basis. These conservatives have done everything they can to attack Trump and investigate him for his collusion with Russia, thereby blocking Trump from rolling back the clock on progress. In light of their contributions, today I just wanted to give a shout-out to many of the “conservative heroes” who have done everything they can to tear down the orange tyrant:
- Bill Kristol: Kristol can perhaps be described as the leader of the #NeverTrump movement. Kristol was instrumental in launching the candidacy of #NeverTrumper Evan McMullin (a.k.a., Egg McMuffin). Kristol not only makes excellent prognostications on a daily basis, but he also has done everything he can to humiliate the media for their pro-Trump approach:
- Ben Shapiro: Shapiro is the definition of principled. Shapiro not only refused to support Trump, but he even quit his job at Breitbart News to protest its pro-Trump extremism.
- Jonah Goldberg: Goldberg is a senior editor of the National Review, one of the leaders of the #NeverTrump movement. On February 15, 2016, the National Review devoted an entire issue towards tearing down Trump, entitled “Against Trump”. Many National Review editors, including Rich Lowry and David French, continue to attack Trump on a near daily basis, supporting Trump’s impeachment with citations from accredited media publications, such as the Washington Post and the New York Times.
- Mark Levin: Levin is generally unhinged and shouts too much, but we have nonetheless applauded his shouting against Donald Trump. Levin is a strong #NeverTrumper.
Who are your conservative heroes? Feel free to comment in the space below!