Thanks to feminism, the white male patriarchy, in it’s original form, has been completely eradicated. And although it still lingers on in sinister, unseen ways, we should take some time to appreciate just how far we’ve come. The patriarchy is a system of oppression that seeks to subjugate women, relegating them to dull, boring roles in society such as raising children, looking pretty and doing the cooking and cleaning, while men get to have exciting careers and enjoy the glory and honor of fighting in wars. The women of the 1950’s used to long for the glamour and independence of a corporate career, instead of sitting at home and looking after children. They also looked with envy upon the statues and medals awarded to fallen soldiers, and wished that they too could one day be honored with such reverence. But the patriarchy was built to keep women out of the old boys’ club, so that they could never have the freedom, excitement and independence they so craved.
A typical day for a woman in an oppressive 1950’s patriarchal relationship consisted of kissing her suited-up husband goodbye as he trotted off to work, while she had nothing to look forward to but cleaning, cooking, dropping the kids off at school, and conversing with shallow housewives with no aspirations beyond their dull, suburban lives. After a long, exhausting day of finding things to do with her time, a woman would have to welcome her husband home as he stumbled through the door after a stimulating day at work and drinks with colleagues. Fraught with jealousy, and wondering if he’d cheated on her, she would then have to provide him with a perfect steak dinner and a glass of scotch. Later that evening, her husband would force himself on her and demand sex, and after years of indoctrination by the patriarchy, she would feel helpless but to oblige. As part of white male rape culture, women were expected to have sex with their husbands, even if they didn’t feel like it, which was most of the time.
On Friday nights, husbands would take their wives to dinner parties and drive-in movies, and would again rape them later that night when they got home. On the weekends, they would have neighborhood barbecues, where women would be expected to prepare desserts and look after children, while the men stood around the grill, laughing and drinking beer. Shallow, pretty women, the arch enemies of feminism, would want to gossip about men, events and social matters, while burgeoning feminists longed to join the men and talk politics and sport. Women were literally enslaved to their husbands, who enjoyed lives of independence and leisure, while women were expected to live mundane, shallow lives with no meaning and purpose.
Today however, women are much happier, and are working in exciting careers, often not bothering to get married until they are in their 40s, by which time they don’t need no man, because they earn more and are better educated than most of the men, and all the best men are already married to younger prettier women. Which is great, because that forces them to be independent forever, preferring the company of cats, TV series and the occasional male escort. This is the life feminists have created for women, and it’s everything the patriarchy was not – exciting, carefree, liberating and empowering. So let’s continue convincing girls to hate and fear men, boss them around and try to outdo them, because it can only lead to more good things. The original patriarchy is long dead, and good riddance I say, because it brought nothing but pain and misery to 50% of the population.