“Barack Obama Day” Is Now An Official Holiday

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Historians have reached a consensus that Barack Hussein Obama was America's greatest President.


Chicago, Illinois (Accredited Times) – When Barack Hussein Obama initially ran for office, many compared him to Jesus.  Like Jesus, Obama is black.  Like Jesus, Obama healed the sick.  And, like Jesus, Obama is also a messianic figure who brought “hope” and “change” to the world.

Now, like Jesus, Obama has his own official holiday, a solemn occasion to remember this most holy African-American — our first “Gay President“.

The Illinois state government, a government known for its innovative fiscal progressivism, has declared August 4th “Barack Obama Day” from henceforth until the end of days, when Obama shall cometh with clouds to save humanity from a Trumpian apocalypse.

Joy to the world, the Lord has come!
Let earth receive her King!
Let every heart prepare Him room!
And Heaven and nature sing!
And Heaven and nature sing!
And Heaven, and Heaven, and nature sing!

Like Jesus, Obama is black.

Born in Kenya, Obama started off with humble beginnings as the putative son of a Muslim goat herder.  As the declared son of a Muslim, Obama himself became a Muslim at birth under shariah law.  Obama then reaffirmed his Muslim faith by reciting the shahada while attending an Islamic school in Indonesia.  Obama later ran openly as a Muslim, discussing his Muslim faith openly with ABC News’ top political journalist George Stephanopoulos, who also served as a top political operative for Bill Clinton immediately before joining ABC News.

Later it turned out that Obama’s real father was actually another man, Frank Marshall Davis, a known pornographer and card-carrying member of the Communist Party USA.  Obama repeatedly conceded Davis’ parentage by referring to Davis as “pop” and even wrote a homosexual poem about Davis under the same name.  The poem includes the lines: “Stain on his shorts that I’ve got on mine [sic] and Makes [sic] me smell his smell [sic]”.  However, at that point, Obama had already embraced Islam, and Obama’s homosexual “red diaper baby” roots made him even more edgy and hip.

Newsweek initially broke the story on Obama’s homosexuality in the accredited media.

Now America’s first communist, homosexual, Muslim, African-American President has his own holiday — and progressives couldn’t be any happier.

“I won’t have to worry about putting gas in my car!  I won’t have to worry about paying my mortgage!” African-American Peggy Joseph said.

Under the law, “Barack Obama Day” will be “observed throughout the State as a day set apart to honor the 44th President of the United States of America who began his career serving the People of Illinois in both the Illinois State Senate and the United States Senate, and dedicated his life to protecting the rights of Americans and building bridges across communities”.  Progressive Governor Bruce Rauner, a Republican, signed the bill into law on Friday.  Like John McCain, Rauner has opposed any efforts to repeal ObamaCare, a law that gave healthcare to all Americans, documented and undocumented alike.

The only questions are (1) when the rest of the country will make “Barack Obama Day” an official national holiday, and (2) when the country will also make “Michelle Obama Day” an official national holiday.  Anything less would clearly be racist.

Pbier

It’s not that I have any doubt over Obama’s credentials, it’s just that I am sick of the alt right’s objections about our saviour. ‘When did he ever perform a miracle’ they ask rhetorically, adjusting their KKK head-pieces. When did he heal the lame, or bring eyesight back to the blind or even cause possessed pigs to leap off cliffs?

So, I have a modest proposition. Let Obama be crucified on a Friday afternoon and then prove the doubters wrong by being resurrected on the third day. I’m sure he’ll be fine with this.

#accredited-times-pick

John Sakars
John Sakars

One reason I can do a lot of activism, is because I have nothing else going on in my life. I have no job, no girlfriend, no children, no animal companions, no house to take care of, no car to pay for, no cell phone bill. My life is extremely simple. Just couch surf, do activism, make vegan videos.

hungrypirana
hungrypirana

This half-negro warrants a no more than a half-day commemoration. Praise the lord. The other half needs to commemorate white recovery, for all who suffered through 8 years of Obama’s plunder and lawlessness.

#racist

MillionDollarBonus

I’m so proud of our first African American president! He gave poor people healthcare who under a Republican president would have been left to die in the streets. He got the most money from Wall Street of any president in US history because they knew he was the only one smart enough to save the global economy, and they were right. And he fixed Bush’s evil foreign policy with a record number of strategic drone strikes. Obama was the best president ever!

Ted Cruz
Ted Cruz

When will Illinois enact a Benedict Arnold holiday?

Vladmir Putin
Vladmir Putin

You missed something important, of Obama’s role as a community grazer, er …, community organizer. The eunuchs paraded as emperors, shouldn’t have done anything useful in life, except attended meetings or addressed crowds. They should have some insecurity – racial, gender, or money, so that they could be manipulated to follow their handler’s agenda.

#hate-speech

richandrenee

This is a hate-speech flag Vlad – that’s serious.

Either you’re going to tone down the nasty words or you could be looking at a lifetime ban.

Vladmir Putin
Vladmir Putin

It has been my observation that the eunuchs are selected from putrid cesspools using some careful criteria. The current set of eunuchs being paraded as emperors, in various countries around the globe, you can verify, are insecure from their lack of money, their race, their gender or their education. Obama, who is no longer President, was insecure about his black race. These people have surprisingly quick rise to the top, supported by synchronized propaganda from MSM.
Having said that, I also fully agree with AT’s praise of Obama’s origins, as probable son of a muslim goat herder, but later proved to be the son of a pornographer.

Expat Logger
Expat Logger

Good point, Vlad. Same thing is happening in Europe. The boy emperor Macron who was recently installed in France had a meteoric rise to power like Obama with full support from the usual suspects!

MillionDollarBonus

Hi folks. I have a personal announcement to make. As many of you know, I recently came out as non-binary, and I have been so humbled by your kind words and sympathy – I’m reveling in it, in fact.

The realization that I had become non-binary came after many years on the raw vegan diet, which is scientifically proven to lower testosterone and make people more docile and susceptible to progressivism. But recently, I had a talk with my accredited doctor, and he warned me that my testosterone levels are dangerously low, to the point that my health is in serious jeopardy. So I’m taking the rest of the week off to go for emergency testosterone replacement therapy. I hope this turns me into more of an ANTIFA punk and doesn’t turn me into a conservative, as I’ve heard that people with more testosterone tend to have conservative views.

Wish me luck guys. I’ll pop in now and then, but will only be back full time next week. All the best till then!

richandrenee

Wow that’s exciting MDB – it’s time that you looked after your gender identity and health. Stay well.

trav777

Testosterone levels cannot be “too” low if we want to eradicate toxic masculinity.

High T levels are only desirable when women are ovulating and only in other men.

Expat Logger
Expat Logger

That’s what my nurse says womyn should select alpha males for breeding and beta males for bringing up their children!

Vladmir Putin
Vladmir Putin

Your alpha-feminist-girlfriend crushed your balls? When you go for your testicle replacement therapy, make sure one of them is lower than the other one.

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