How The Illuminati Brotherhood Changed My Life

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As many of you may have noticed, a group of very important Nigerian Illuminati druids have graced us with their presence, offering a once in a lifetime opportunity to join the very prestigious Illuminati Brotherhood. At first I thought the offer was a Russian scam, masked behind Nigerian country codes to make the whole thing look legit. But the thought that this might truly be a rare opportunity to join one of the most notorious progressive cults on the planet continued to gnaw away at me until I couldn’t take it any longer, and I finally agreed to pay them the money. Immediately after making the payment, I got cold feet, and thought that I’d made a terrible mistake. I thought I’d surely been scammed. “What the hell was I thinking?”, I thought to myself, as I felt my body seethe with with regret and anger at the Russian scammers. But before I could even pick up the phone to demand my $10,000 back, I received a very strange telephone call from a blocked number, and a deep voice uttered “congratulations my friend, you have been accepted into the Illuminati Brotherhood. All we ask now, is that you give us your soul, and in return, great fortune awaits you.”.

I was instructed to show up at a special club in Los Angeles, where I was greeted by a diverse group of progressives with evil grins on their faces, who have since become very good friends. Together, we learned about how to use evil to overcome all of our problems in life, and to achieve everything we’ve ever dreamed of. We learned that satanism is all about doing whatever you want, no matter whether it is morally right or wrong, and that society is becoming more and more satanic, whether people realize it or not. Learning that evil was not in fact bad, and was really just a tool to get whatever you want without worrying about the effects of your actions on others, opened up a whole world of possibility, and allowed me to see myself and the world in a totally different way.

I learned at the Illuminati Brotherhood meetings that evil needs to be practiced and worshiped in order to change your mindset and train you to apply the principles of evil in real life. I learned that in order to destroy any sense of morality or a conscience you might have, you need to do things that are so morally reprehensible that you can never forgive yourself or repent. You need to be evil to do evil. In order to become evil we practiced all kinds of things from spirit cooking, to “mock” human sacrifice, to holding up an effigy of Trump’s severed head. The experiences were horrifying at first, but after a while I became desensitized and numb. I feel ready to acquire great wealth and fortune now using my evil mindset, but I do worry that I’ll be numbed to the experience when I finally get what I want.

I absolutely recommend taking these Nigerian brothers up on their offer. It’s not a scam – it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity to understand the mindset behind some of the greatest community organizers and progressive movers and shakers, from Hillary Clinton to Barrack Obama. It’s an opportunity to live the lives of the most powerful people in the world, and achieve success beyond your wildest dreams. And all that is required in return is your soul. What are souls even good for? It’s an offer you can’t refuse – so grab it with both hands, and never look back.

Make my votes count
Make my votes count

Wow this is fantastic news. Any time a progressive movement can be expanded it is a good thing.
I certainly hope that you share some of the better spirit cooking recipes with your dedicated readers who, due to Trumps cut backs, can’t afford the $10,000 fee. If there are any links to their video library that you can share that would be great too. Who doesn’t like to watch a mock sacrifice.

Luckily being progressive it is pretty easy to “destroy any sense of morality or a conscience” since we have had to do that to adapt to our ever changing agendas.

I realize that this formerly secret society probably still has some things like a secret hand shake and hand signals that we would not ask you to reveal. Does the membership fee cover the costs of satanic robes and the symbolic ring or do you have to purchase those from a catalog?

Pbier

‘Can’t afford the $10,000 fee’?

I suggest you get it contact with ‘Tony Smith’ (see https://www.accredited-times.com/2017/09/25/illuminati-sue-lady-gaga/) right now. He is offering not only $300,000,000 cash reward when you join but a monthly wage of $70,000,000. If your bank is unwilling to lend you a mere $10,000, I suggest you show them Tony Smith’s comment.

If it is a serious bank, they will spot immediately that Tony Smith is not a common Nigerian name, thus lending his comment the required accreditation.

Truthspoon

I’m actually a member of the Illuminati and YES we do engage in orgiastic sex-rites dedicated to Satan….many of our members are feminists and a variety of fellow progressives…and they come in all shapes and sizes….. this is the reason we choose to wear blindfolds or insist certain people wear masks or hoods during our orgies….. also our orgies are all conducted in candlelight too. It’s much better that way. Sometimes less is more.

hungrypirana
hungrypirana

I blew coffee over my keyboard when I read the 13th word, Nigerian. Couldn’t read past that. Kindly email your address so that I may send a bill for damages.

Black Lives Matter

Nigerians are honest. In fact, I’ve recently been having some correspondence with a Nigerian prince who needs some help with fund transfers. He’s progressive too, so I know he’s trustworthy.

Pbier

I’d go a step further and say Nigerians are some of the most altruistic and generous people on Earth.

Imagine that your father/ uncle/ husband etc. passed away and left $100 million, which just needed to be unblocked from a bank account. Like me, you’d probably expect to pay a few hundred dollars at the most by way of an administration fee. At worst, you’d hire a local lawyer or accountant and pay a few thousand. But, our Nigerian friends want to share the love and pay YOU up to 40-50% How amazing a deal is that?

drb6
drb6

http://www.419eater.com/html/trophy_room.htm

This website showcases generosity and good will of the Nigerian princes.

drb6
drb6

And the prince is African, which I suppose is better even than African American?

drb6
drb6

I suggest that you contact Tony Smith or any of the other highly recommended Nigerian princes/bankers/businesspersons/widows/cancer victims. For a low price of $100 they will send you sufficient funds to replace the computer.

bitcoin
bitcoin

Illuminutties, Rothschilds, Al Gore, Bill Gates, Soros, … can only do evil with the cooperation of the people under their control. If no nutties fall for their crooked tricks, there will be no Illuminutties.

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

Unfortunately the world is infested with useful idiots.

Black Lives Matter

I hope Obama wins the next Omniarch selection once our Hungarian sponsor George S. retires.

hungrypirana
hungrypirana

Buy your Niger here…. Only $400. I need only three.

http://www.cnn.com/2017/11/14/africa/libya-migrant-auctions/index.html

Henry
Henry

Good news to all… Don`t fail to see the light..

The illuminati welcomes new members to join the elite brotherhood of
wealth ,riches and you get your heart desires.Whatsapp the master at
WhatsApp +2348136569627
( to get what ever you desire. No registration fee required to join
the brotherhood so beware of scamms.You can also connect with us on
Viber +2348146721200)
or email:illuminatipower606@gmail.com

James clerk
James clerk

It is a well-known fact that Illuminati consist of Multi Millionaires,
Billionaires who have major influence regarding most global affairs,
including the planning of a New World Order. Many world leaders,
Presidents, Prime Ministers, royalty and senior executives of major Fortune
500 companies are members of Illuminati. join a secret cabal of mysterious
forces and become rich with boundless measures of wealth in your company or
any given business, the great Illuminati can make everything possible just
contact : jamesclerk250@gmail.com or WhatsApp +2348168596024 EL
IAI LEXION Thaddeus Iam Vice-President of Citizen Outreach THE ILLUMINATI
ORGANIZATION
Do not hesitate to contact us by WhatsApp.
Whatsapp: +2348168596024
Email : jamesclerk250@gmail.com
BE ABOVE THE AGE OF 18YRS.
THANKS

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