The Muhammads – The Funniest Movie of 2018

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The Accredited Times has been given an exclusive scoop on an up and coming Hollywood blockbuster that is setting itself up to be the funniest movie of 2018. The story is set in modern Britain, where a white working class family have their world turned upside down when a large Muslim family moves in next door. As you can imagine, hilarity ensues as the neighbors experience one culture clash after another, and eventually the white working class family is forced to come to terms with the reality of Britain’s cultural shift and modernize their beliefs to accommodate their new neighbors.

The story is set in a little village on the outskirts of London, where Britain’s toxic whiteness and the patriarchy somehow seem to have survived despite all of the country’s social advancements. The residents are deeply racist in their ways, and are constantly railing on about “foreigners” and “Islamic extremists”. The featured white family members each typify everything that is wrong with the modern white conservative family. The father works as a plumber, doing manual labor that most educated progressives believe is beneath them, while the mother works as a hairdresser, where she spends her time gossiping about trivial things with other shallow women obsessed with appearance and appeasing the patriarchy. The son is constantly glued to racist YouTube channels like Black Pigeon Speaks and Mark Dice, and regurgitating fake news at the dinner table, while the sister is obsessed with “jocks” and alpha male wannabes at school. Thankfully, this sad state of affairs is promptly put to an end when a large Muslim family of 10 moves in next door.

When the Muhammads move in, their white neighbors are suddenly woken at 5:00 am in a state of shock by the call to prayer. “What the hell is going on out here!”, the bald, tattooed white father shouts as he storms out of the front door half-dressed, only to fall silent as he sees a family of ten in the yard next door on their knees facing mecca. After finishing their prayers, the Muslim family get up, and the Muslim father walks up to his neighbor and says “are you fucking stupid? These are our morning prayers. Do you know how important this is to us? If you interrupt me like that again I’ll declare Jihad on you, you slimy, bald twat!”. The white man responds in a fit of rage “You fucking muzzie cunt! Don’t you fucking ever wake me up like that again or I’ll call the police! What the fuck are you doing here anyway?? Go back to where ya come from, you stupid shit!!”. After exchanging insults for a full 10 minutes, they slam their doors shut.

The next morning, the call to prayer occurs again at exactly the same time, this time a little louder. Infuriated, the white father picks up the phone and rings the police. When the police arrive, they apologize to the Muslim neighbors and give a warning to the white man for being racist. “If you don’t like it”, says one of the policemen, “you can simply move. We don’t tolerate Islamophobia or racism in this country anymore. This is Britain, and everyone is welcome here. If you can’t accept that, then maybe you don’t belong here. This Muslim family is more British than you will ever be”.

The movie continues with a series of feuds with backward white Britain, that become ever more hilarious. One of the rebel sons in the Muslim family is constantly watching ISIS videos online, and caught trying to make bombs, while arguing with his dad about what the best way to deal with the infidels is. His father takes a more moderate approach of letting Allah deal with them, whereas the son is adamant that Jihad is the right way to go about it.

The story really demonstrates some of the comical cultural issues that Britain is struggling with at the moment, and allows Brits to laugh at their problems and pretend they’re not serious. I give this movie a 10/10, and I recommend all our readers check it out when it is released later this year.

richandrenee

It’s only going to be a generation or two and England will be a majority Muslim country. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I find that incredibly exciting!

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

It will be even more exciting when they take you on the roof to give FREE FLYING lessons

How GREAT is THAT!

intersectionalityisforeveryone
intersectionalityisforeveryone

Sounds like a real scream. Can’t wait to have a laugh at those hysterical islamophobes. Muslims really are a saving grace for that pale, stale inbred island.

You might want to read a short book called ‘The Medina Carta’ to find out more on how Shari’a can help pull Britain out of the middle ages.

richandrenee

Wow – thanks for the reading tip intersect. We can’t wait to share it with our book club. Being feminists, it’s only natural that we should support Islamification!

Pbier

Thanks for the recommendation. I’m a third of the way through this can’t-put-down-except-I-just-did book. AT readers will NOT be disappointed, filled as it is with timeless wisdom. It reminds the world, for example, of how tolerant Islam is towards gays in recognising the rights they have. The most important right being the right to convert to Islam.

John Sakars
John Sakars

Let’s get rid of all borders and let people go wherever they want to go.

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

I have absolutely no problem with letting you go to Venezuela or North Korea

You returning is what I have a problem with.

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

Does it demonstrate the traditional ALLAH given instructions on how to beat a wife?

How about how to have quasi sex with a 6-9 year old and real sex with a 9 year old?

How about a demonstration of Batcha Bazi

Batcha Bazi is an Islamic custom described by the phrase “Women are for Kids and Boys are for Pleasure”

Abu
Abu

After we get rid of all borders, Anon will be our president because he knows everything about everything. Breathology, moon God, and sun God and how he will send all Black back to Africa. 95 percent of time we are not breathing fully because we are busy running after the world and not paying attention within ourselves. Anon will teach us so that we can can have some peace in this world.

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

Of course the other 5% of the time Blacks are breathing deeply and fully

Because of the Muslims slave traders chasing in to cut off your balls

Breath deep, Run fast, and never ever look behind.

It will only slow you down

Black Lives Matter

Wait — 10 is a large family?

#Snackbar

hungrypirana
hungrypirana

Schmuck Schumer got his ass handed to him today. Drink that thin gruel commies!! #MAGA

#antisemitic

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

It’s not like taking away public services from US citizens, in order to pander to illegal aliens that can’t vote, will see a positive result in the next election

Dems folded like a house of cards.

hungrypirana
hungrypirana

Read it and learn, unless you’re closed minded.

#neoliberalism

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hungrypirana
hungrypirana

Negotiate this, commies:

#russian-propaganda

Jello-Cherry-Box-Small.jpg
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

Jello WINS!!!!!

vacamuerta
vacamuerta

The worse part of this is is that it is not the first time these hideous, stupid tattooed scumbags have had their racism confronted. Their grandparents left Southall in the 1960s and moved to Luton, and their children left Luton in the 80s for the same reason – the racism that is inherent in white genes. Whilst the lazy white charges a hundred quid to change a tap washer (and they wonder why smart people employ Poles?) during the day he then sits drinking lager and watching soccer on TV all evening whilst the hard working Muslim father is working his butt off delivering Pizza to put food on the table of his wives and children. England would fall apart if it was not for hardworking immigrants doing jobs that lazy whites wont do. I am reliably told that the UK national health service would collapse it were not for the third world medical know how provided by immigrants.

vacamuerta
vacamuerta

Reminds me of this:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1050672/Muslim-man-jailed-years-stabbing-death-neighbour–BNP-activist.html

Should act as a warning to white trash, watch out or you may be manslaughtered too!.

Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness
Mules! Proof of Allahs Kindness

We should fear trash like this?

I prefer a joyful afternoon watching them getting impaled.

http://dailycaller.com/2018/01/03/somali-immigrant-allegedly-tried-to-rape-woman-in-labor/

Somali Immigrant Allegedly Tried To Rape Woman In Labor

Alì Abdella, 38, has been accused of sexual violence and theft by attempting to rape an unidentified woman, 43, while she was in labor at the Sant’Eugenio Hospital in Rome, reported Italian outlet Il Libero Quotidianno. Abdella allegedly stole and donned a green hospital uniform, entered the woman’s hospital room, and began groping her thigh and masturbating in front of her, reported La Stampa.

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